Do's
1. Ring home. You're embarking on this brand-new adventure while your poor parents are at home, starring into your empty bedroom, missing you lots and wondering what you're up to - don't forget about them! Ring home whenever you can and chat to whoever's available. Make sure you text lots too so they know you're alive and well. I let my mum track me on Find My Friends so she could see where I was and what I was up to, although it did sometimes say I was in the Brayford which was a bit of a cause for concern... Ultimately, your parents have probably helped you get to uni, so repay them and make them feel a part of your new life.
2. Take lots of photographs. Freshers Week will come and go in a flash, take photographs so that you can remember it! I love looking back at my Freshers photos and seeing how young we all looked, all the emotions come flooding back and I can remember how nervous and excited I was in every picture. These are memories that you'll treasure in just a year or two!
3. Buy a key ring for your new flat key. You don't want to end up locked out of your flat, trust me, I did it multiple times throughout my first couple of years at uni and I think my flatmates were sick to death of having to come and let me in! Buy a distinctive key ring and stick your key (and fob, if you have one) on there - make sure it's bulky enough to find at the bottom of your bag, but also compact enough to fit in your clutch or pocket for nights out!
4. Try to cook. If you're not much of a chef then the kitchen might be a little intimidating, especially if everyone else seems a lot more capable than you are, but now is the time to learn! I was nervous to cook and eat in front of other people because of issues I had with food during my adolescence, but because I got stuck in and used the kitchen from the very first week I soon became comfortable in there. Start with the basics; beans on toast, a stir fry, an oven pizza etc. and once you have a bit more courage you can explore new recipes. The more you do something the easier it gets!
5. Use the laundry room. As I say, the more you do something the easier it gets, that's the same with laundry. Dragging your washing basket across to the laundry room can also be a bit daunting, but if you do it from the first week and work out how to use the machines then you'll have nothing to worry about further on in the year! The longer you avoid it because you're feeling a bit anxious or even just lazy, the scarier it's going to be. Everybody expects freshers to make mistakes, don't be scared to do something wrong, it's better to try and make a mistake in the first week than it is a few months in!
6. Keep your bedroom clean and tidy. Start as you mean to go on. A tidy house means a tidy mind, during Freshers week you're going to benefit from having at least one aspect of your life controlled and kept orderly because the entire week is pretty chaotic! After a night out take the pizza box out of your room and put it in the recycling bin. Tidy up your make-up station, hang your clothes up or put them in your wash basket! Open your curtains and even your windows if you need to freshen the room up a little bit! I always feel so much more at ease when I'm sat in a clean, tidy space.
7. Go on nights out. You may love clubbing, you may hate it, you may never have even been to a club. Freshers week means clubs are going to be busy, hot, and a bit overwhelming, but they're part of the Freshers experience and you really should push yourself to go. Pre-drinks are going to be a great opportunity to meet new people in your accommodation and establish friendships, you may see people in the clubs from your welcome week lectures and talks that you can also go and say hello to. If everyone in your flat loves clubbing and you hate it, try to find out what your neighbours think, or the people living upstairs or downstairs, find someone who is like minded to you and go together - you don't have to stay for long but at least you've made the effort!
8. Sign up for a society. Even if you're not sure if it's for you, if you're nervous or don't know how you'll fit it in, sign up and go along to the taster session. Embrace new opportunities and try things out, then you'll be able to safely say whether or not you're good at something or enjoy it. Even if it turns out that you're absolutely rubbish at this particular sport or club, you tried and now you know that for the future! You've got nothing to lose!
9. Budget yourself and monitor your spending. Student finance may not have gone in yet so you're probably living off your savings/parent's money, for goodness sake, spend it wisely! Managing your money isn't the most exciting aspect of adult life, but I'd say it's the most important for sure. If you get say £70 a week, work out what you'll need for nights out/food shopping/uni supplies/social events and budget accordingly! Get online banking so you can keep track of your income and expenditures from home and be sensible with your purchases - if you don't need it, don't buy it.
Don't's
1. Don't limit your friendship group to your flatmates. While you may really like your flatmates at first, this isn't forced to last. The strains of communal living are bound to take a toll and some of you might not make it out as friends. The one person I was particularly close to in my first year flat I now have absolutely nothing to do with. People aren't always as they seem, and uni can change you a LOT - in some cases, for the worst. Don't just become besties with one flatmate and avoid forming a little clique with your flatmates too. Branch out and get to know other people in the accommodation, try to make friends on your course or from a society, it's often useful to have an escape away from your flat and a wide and varied group of mates to spend your time with!
2. Don't rush into making close personal friendships. As I've just said, not everyone is always as they seem. People are often very friendly during Freshers but with time show their true colours, try not to be drawn in. Introduce yourself, hang out, but have your guard up a little bit and don't go into the in's and out's of your life just yet.
3. Don't drink to impress. If you're not a big drinker then don't pretend to be. Uni's great for recreating yourself, maybe you didn't go out much before but really want to now - that's fine, but you have to know your limits. Everything you do should be for you, because you're the one that's got to live with it afterwards. I know so much people that tried to keep up with the big drinkers either to impress them or to fit in with them, and then ended up in absolute states, vomiting, weeing and crying everywhere. It was embarrassing, and nobody forgets that sort of behaviour. You don't want to be that person, so know when you need to stop with the shots!
4. Don't be rude or insensitive towards people if their first week isn't going as smoothly as yours. Some people might be really struggling, so don't go and thoughtlessly brag about how great you're settling in or how much you're getting on with everybody. Just because you're feeling pretty settled, it doesn't mean that everybody else is. Be patient and try to recognise that somebody being quiet or a little bit reclusive doesn't necessarily mean they're rude, maybe they just need somebody to be friendly towards them!
5. Don't invite friends from home. You need some time to establish yourself as an individual and do your own thing, this is probably your first taste of independence, so don't ruin that by letting your mates tag along. If you bring them then you're less likely to mingle and make new friends, which will come back to bite you when they've gone home and you're left on your own. Also, their behaviour will reflect onto you and sometimes that's not a good thing! They have a whole year to visit, but this is your time, so be selfish and choose to go it alone for this week!
6. Don't hide away in your bedroom. People will form friendships without you if you don't put yourself out there. Obviously, it's good to have some alone time now and then, and at some point during Freshers you will benefit from being on your own and chilling out! Make sure it's not all the time though. Try to sit in the kitchen to have your meals, if you have a sofa area then watch TV there rather than on your bed, it's all about making yourself available really.
7. Don't lie. Don't lie about your pre-uni life. So many people I met during the first week told lies about their a level results, their drinking habits, even really personal things like being diagnosed with mental health disorders - I caught them ALL out eventually. I know you might want to recreate yourself, and that's fine, maybe you want to be a new, better version of you! Just don't get carried away, stick with the truth. If there's something you don't like about yourself that you've maybe done in the past just keep it private, don't lie and say it never happened! You'll be found out and that isn't going to look good.
8. Don't sleep with your flatmate. Just don't do it, not this early on. No matter how well you're getting on, no matter how drunk you are, do not do it. I ended up in a relationship with one of the people from my accommodation, I'm actually still with him now (shout out to you Matt) and first kissed him towards the end of freshers week, obviously I don't regret it but when I look back I realise how little we actually knew about each other at that point, it's scary! If you sleep with your flatmate in the first week then there's gonna be an atmosphere for the rest of the year, even if you're a super casual person that can brush it off, it's not going to make for a great living environment for everybody else! Just hold off until freshers is over, so you're not binge drinking quite so heavily or feeling quite as vulnerable and are more conscious of what this will mean for the future! 9. Don't miss out on the freshers fayres. They're busy, stressful, confusing and it's WAY too hot in there, but you have to persevere and get through the freshers fayres! You can get loads of freebies and it's where you'll sign up to any societies you might want to join. They're worth going along to, even when your head's pounding from the night before, just for the free pasta if nothing else!
Just remember that you're not on holiday, after this week is over there are still three years left of this experience, so start as you mean to go on and don't treat it as something temporary that you can forget! Enjoy yourself and make the right choices. Good luck!